Steak Is Still Alive

April 6, 2012

I can’t let this thing end. I’ve gone more than an entire month without missing a day. I’ve worked too hard for too long to just let this thing walk away from me. So, here is my half witted attempt to keep you people happy.

It’s the No-Miss-List of things I usually forget to do:

  1.  Hang up my towel after I’m done with it.
  2. Put that twisty tie thing back on the bread to seal it up.
  3. Do my laundry on a day other than Sunday. Sunday night to be exact.
  4. Clean my razor every day.
  5. Find a devoted area to put my dress pants.
  6. Build a lamp.
  7. Garbage runs on Tuesdays and FRIDAYS. Not Thursdays.
  8. Come up with more interesting posts before I attempt to post things.

There you go. Steak is still working!

Go, me.

And if you noticed that I typed the word “steak” instead of “streak” the entire time…good for you. I’m a moron. You’re the winner.

D.A.

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For the Doubters

March 16, 2012

The fruits of my labor.

:::Takes deep and satisfying breath:::

The marble I have sent to Sweden has officially made it’s debut. The photos you see are courtesy of a Swede named Alba. (I think this would make a very good band name). She’s both a Viking and a ninja. That mixture means she is capable of a lot.

As a matter of fact, you should check out her site at http://elarra.tumblr.com/.

She has sent me some photos that I am allowed to share with you.

Check it out.

And another.

Yeah. That’s a marble on a frozen lake. And yeah, it’s thousands of miles away from where I live.

And just in case you are still doubting. I live in Florida. We don’t have many frozen lakes. So there.

:::Sticks out tongue:::

I’m so proud of this little marble. When he was growing up he was always talking about “making something of himself.” His father, the Marble King, had always treated him poorly. Even in front of distinguished guests.

Well I guess he finally got up the courage to take flight and leave the nest. He now resides under that very bridge in Sweden. (Only rarely does he complain of the troll neighbor).

Okay, none of that is true. Really though. Look at that. I sent a marble to Sweden and it actually made it.

I’ve sent out a number of marbles as of today and I hope I get photos that are half as awesome as these two.

Thanks again to Alba for allowing me to show the photos of my first marble to the European continent!

I guess this is as good of a time as any to inform you of the new page I’ve added to the side bar thingy over there —–>

It’s called “Marbles”, appropriately enough, and it will keep a running tab of the marbles I sent around the world. (As I get more pictures and goodies I’ll share those with you on that part as well.)

I should also mention that I am currently on Spring Break. And we all know what that means.

NAKED. ALL. THE. TIME.

Just kidding.

It means I will start to go stir crazy as I try to figure out what I’m going to do over the vacation period. Unlike most people, I don’t make plans too often, so I just end up doing whatever pops up. I will start to lose it when I realize I have nothing planned…and…I will get bored…

This brings up an odd point about vacation, but I’ll speak on that at a different time. For now I just want you to bask in the fruits of my labor. (That labor includes writing emails/letters/buying envelopes. Not much work really).

Still, it’s so cool.

I should also mention that the ramblings on this site should be picking up in quality and topic over the next…9 days…Because my job will become doing this. I will be living off of my laptop for social interaction.

Which brings up another topic about me being a introvert… but that’ll likely be another post sometime…

Maybe I’ll finish that lamp…Or that explanation of my views of religion and science…or that choose your own adventure novel…

Oh yeah…I guess I could write for my own book as well…

I guess we’ll just see what actually happens around here.

Now continue basking!

D.A.

The Big Gnus

March 11, 2012

Here’s that news I was preparing you for a few days ago.

Now it’s official:

I have sent two marbles to two different countries! (And maybe even a few more in the coming days)

WOOOOOOOOOOOoooOOOoooOOOooOOooOOoOo…

That’s right. In the matter of a couple of weeks I have put marbles in Sweden, Lebanon, and Australia.

I’m so productive.

:::Pats self on back:::

Still haven’t finished that lamp yet…or that book I’m writing….

:::Mumbles list of other things that have been neglected over time:::

I would love to be able to say that these people have been reading my goals here on this site and have decided to help me out. But the traffic is a little low for trying to take over the world. So I broke down and went to the place that is currently taking over the world. My constant internet companion; Reddit. Reddit has a subreddit for penpals and it looks like I have made a number of penpals through it.

That is all. Carry on.

D.A.

Tell Me What To Do!

February 16, 2012

This weekend will be my first full weekend in 3 weeks. It will also be a long one.

I’m looking at the precious 72 hours as a real opportunity to do something special. I would come up with a cool plan myself, but I’ve already used up all my good ideas and inspiration this week. So YOU need to tell me what to do.

What would you recommend? Should I…

  1. Go camping?
  2. explore a city I’ve never been to before?
  3. Eat a two pound BBQ pulled pork sandwich?
  4. Begin a Pez collection?
  5. Workout to the song “You’re the Best Around” by Joe Esposito?
  6. Shave my head?
  7. Clean out a neighbors gutters?
  8. Go see a doctor to receive a full colonic irrigation?
  9. Go rent a car and tell everybody about my disdain for the company because they “only had a compact”?
  10. Finish my lamp?
  11. Go bowling and bowl 3 consecutive games of exactly 156?
  12. Try out for a professional soccer team?
  13. Perform my own rendition of ‘One Flew Over the Cockoo’s Nest’ in a city park?
  14. Learn to weave baskets?
  15. Grow a beard overnight and then enter a beard contest?
  16. Flash mob in a mall?
  17. Buy a new towel?
  18. Rent a tent for a large outdoor event?
  19. Clean the undercarriage of my car?
  20. Sleep?

Yeah, those are just a few things I thought up but I’m positive you can come up with better.

So help me out. What should I do?

D.A.

Remember My Lamp?

October 18, 2011

Me too!

Just in case you don’t remember, I have been working on a “steampunk” themed lamp for the past…oh let’s say 3 months.

And it’s not because I have been hard at work looking for the right kind of material, making plans, or cutting and welding pipe. It all because I’m a lazy bum that doesn’t manage to finish what he starts.

Well, the past weekend, I committed a little more than I usually do and actually made some more progress!

Now it is officially glued and painted. See for yourself.

Annnnd from another angle…

Yeah, it looks like a real mismatch of pieces and parts. It even looks pretty coppery (if that’s even a word). So i’m thinking it meeting my idea and my theme. So there is at least one goal accomplished.

For those of you who still have no idea what my original plan was, allow me to explain. If you notice the base of the lamp itself (notice the brass colored fixture in mid front) is going to seperate from the lamp shade. This is unique because lamp shades are usually connected to the light fixture by some shade support build into the fixture. This lamp will not have a shade connected in this manner.

Instead, the shade will be dangling above the bulb via an long extension of pipe that takes an upside down L shape from behind and moving forward on the lamp. (It’s the seemingly useless part reaching up into the sky).

In my exploratory project here I found out why my plan really wasn’t a very good one. Or, maybe I was just a little too ambitious for a first try.

 

It is much easier to center a lamp shade position when it’s always connected and centered to the light bulb itself. As you will notice in the photo above, the hanging pipe for the shade is about an inch and a half to two inches behind the base of the bulb.

Whoops.

This is not only going to make to process longer to complete (because it must be corrected), but it also jeopardizes the whole integrity for the support pipe of the shade. I will have to add an extension and that could add too much weight and make the whole contraption bow or bend.

All in all, I think this is just one teensy little problem that can be smoothed over soon enough.

Another problem I had earlier was picking out a lamp shade to go with this thing. And I did that! It’s a utensil carrier/holder that you would usually see in school lunchrooms. I think the color and the size are just about right. Plus it also has holes which will make it look more… cool… I guess. (By the way, I picked this little thing up from Ikea while I purchased my big ol’ picture frame last weekend.)

Oh yeah, I have a picture of that too!

Yeah, I think that’ll do juuuuust fine. (Truthfully, I’m just happy to finally pick something to cover of this thing.) I’m not sure if I will line the interrior of the shade with a paper/material to help “soften” the light as it exits those holes. And that’s just a small decision that I will make when I’m about to put the thing in its final position.

Still, there is one more thing. A big thing. And the big thing is the small things. Detail.

My photos don’t really show this problem, but maybe you noticed it. The color of the whole thing is not what I really want. It doesn’t look like I’ve made this thing from copper. I’ve been many hours researching and playing around with different mixtures of color on how to create a “patina” on copper in order to make it look more genuine, yet there is no success. I have no idea how I will accomplish this goal.

Keep in mind I made this whole kaboodle out of CPVC pipe. (I didn’t want to spend nearly $50 and risk burning my fingers off trying to assemble a real one.) Since it’s just black and copper spray paint, I want to find a way to make it look more… messy. More dirty. More real. Even though it’s about as fake as a seven toed wallaby I want it to look as natural as possible.

And I just can’t figure it out. I’m not sure what to do.

I may end up just completing the thing as is and worry about little details later. (But more likely I will say ‘done is done’ and never touch it again.) But I guess I should just be happy if I even finish the thing.

Anyway, sleepy time she comes,

D.A.

I’ve Been Writing!

July 1, 2011

That’s not to say i’ve been writing very well…

Still, words is words, and I keep making them.

Those words will become the story that I’m calling I Swear. It’s probably going to be about a clown in court. Hijinks will ensue.

HA! en- SUE! Get it? Court? Sue?

It’ll hit you by the time you’re done with this blog.

(That’s comedy gold by the way)

Also, let me keep you up to date on a few of those projects that I talked about a little while ago.

1. I’m still building a lamp.

It’s coming together…kind of. It’s not going to look how I imagined originally. I think it will hold up to the idea of “steampunk”, so that’s good.

I had a plan when I was making it. But then I said “Wow, look at all this extra stuff I have, I should totally do something with this.” And, well, let’s just say creativity got the best of me?

I still think it will look good, but that’s pretty subjective. I mean, as long as I finish it, and have built it with my own hands, I’m going to think I just carved David from marble.

I’m having issue with trying to decide on whether I should make it look like copper or brass. brass tubing doesn’t really make sense, but it’s a good color. Copper tubing makes sense, but then I would have to paint it so well that it actually looks like copper tubing, and if it doesn’t look right, then it will just look goofy. It’s a catch 22 I suppose. Any suggestions on how to make PVC looks like it’s metal?

I’ll include some photos soon. Maybe I’ll make a before and after update after that?

2. I’m having a surprising amount of support for people wanting me to send them a marble.

And that’s just awesome. 

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then I should tell you that I’m trying to put a marble in each country on the planet. Nothing big, just a marble. Nothing special, just a marble. Nothing weird, just a marble. Not a duck, not a moose, not a rare jewel, just a marble. I want to do this because of the obvious coolness involved with accomplishing something very fun and silly.

Okay, I’m reconsidering. I miiight make it a moose.

Nah, just a marble…

So if you live in a country outside of the U.S.,Canada, Brazil, and potentially South Africa and Thailand, then drop me a comment and tell me where you live. Maybe we can email each other and talk about how I can send you a marble.

If more people join my in my marble journey, then I will probably make a separate page for all the locations that my marbles reside.

OoOoOoOo… Maybe I could do some sweet google maps thing?

Then again, that seems like a lot of work. Let’s just see if this even gets off the ground first, right?

3. You may have noticed that I’ve added a comics page and added more to the “about me” page.

I’ll do that from time to time. Check them out if you wish to unravel more of the mystery of D.A. Bancroft. Or, if you don’t like mysteries, then just learn more about me because you just like learning and reading.

There you go,

D.A.