Gripe #2

March 22, 2012

Since my last post was so successful I’m going to point out a few things that really stick in my craw…

Now, as a note about my previous post, I was serious. Most of the time they are just sad attempts at reaching out. But in some cases they are quite funny. Some of the pun work are pretty good. Everybody who speaks English should at least respect that. It may not bring them in through the door, but at least they may give a little chuckle. And that’s not a bad thing.

Now here is a short(er) list of gripes I have about some not-so-serious topics:

1. Moisture – Come on…when I’m in my house all you do is cause my pages in my books/magazines to wrinkle and help mold to grow in my windows.

Now that I think about it…

2. Mold – Freaking mold…I have that stuff show up in my window at least once a month. It’s like I live in a horror house. My luck I will get a serious disease thanks to this secretive pain…

(Que up the spam folder to fill up with “Prevent Mold in your Home!” messages.)

3. Poptart instructions – Three seconds in the microwave? Three? Are you kidding me? That doesn’t even do anything. Ten seconds minimum.

Now that I think about it…

4. Molten lava from over heated Poptarts – Why must you burn me so?

5. Feral cats –You don’t do anybody any good…You know who you are feral cats…

:::Looks in backyard and shakes fist with rage:::

6.  Slow mail delivery – I gots things to dos. Deliver my mail faster. Like my credit card statement which is strangely not showing up…

7. Fast food – If you advertise to be “fast” with the food you’re delivering…You should, in fact, be fast about it. I live in a town where there is a locally owned fast food restaurant. It’s delicious. It’s delightful. It’s amazingly fattening. It’s also a 20 minute wait at the drive through. Seriously… advertise yourself as “Diner style southern food”. Stop calling yourself fast food.

(Still worth the wait)

8. My own laziness – For obvious reasons. (This explains why I still haven’t earned that doctorate in Quantum Field Theory…)

9. My lack of understanding of Quantum Field Theory – For obvious reasons.

In a totally unrelated note, I may have something super-cool to share with you tomorrow. Maybe.

You have to finish your dinner first though…

D.A.

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Flipin’ Friday

March 2, 2012

So…I did something pretty cool today. I actually became one step closer in my goal of trying to put a marble in every country around the world.

BOOOOYAH!

Freakin’ Sweden shall possess one of my marbles! The land of ice/Ikea/friendly people/LARPers/and a king that will likely get some strange mail very shortly.

How did this marble end up over there? I sort of met a Swede here on the internets. For some reason they thought it would be a good idea to support my cause (Which really isn’t a cause at all).

So…I guess the marble list has crossed off Canada, the United States, and Sweden. That’s 193 more to go.

Things are looking good.

I can’t help but notice that you’re contemplating something…

It … it… it seems that you’re wondering about this odd goal. If you’re kind of new to this blog you may not have heard this before. Well…I have a goal to put a marble on every continent on the planet…Lofty goal, I know, but I might as well try.

Nothing special about the marble. It’s just a marble. Made from cheap glass. I think it cost me a dollar for 100 of them. But the idea of putting something so tiny and worthless in places that could make them kind of important is a really cool thought to me.

And that’s really all there is to that.

It…seems….that you also want to participate… Interesting… I will have to help you do that.

If you live in a strange and far away land (other than one of those listed above) and would like to receive a very not-special marble from a very not-special person…then do I have a deal for you!

Then send me a very non-creepy email…and we’ll talk about it. If you don’t freak me out way too much…Maybe we can give you a marble. What’s my email? Oh, well… you should click the ‘about me’ section of this blog and find out.

D.A.

P.S. – I’ve actually posted on here for 5 days straight…Will he meet his goal by sticking with it through the weekend? Stay tuned to find out.