And The Winner is…..

June 16, 2011

Peter the Poet.

This man was kind enough to participate in my contest, not only once, but twice.

He was also the only human being to participate as well.

So, kudos to you, Peter!


You can find his page Cottonbombs right here. 

I may do a contest again in the future,  but judging from the warm reception of this last attempt, I’ll have to change up how I go about that in the first place. It’s almost as if nobody wanted my lovely gifts…

In a completely unrelated note, me and a buddy saw the movie Super 8 today. Now, I’m not sure what critics and people are really saying about this movie, but I really enjoyed it. It’s sci-fi, fun, and well made. I’m not going to give away any spoilers, but the story is very simple. There really isn’t anything all too deep about the characters. You get what you see.

Usually I would consider this a big downside of a film. I really like complex stories. This one, though, seemed to break that mold for me. Maybe I will be able to look toward the writing in this film and draw some inspiration from the fact that not all stories have to be complex. Sometimes, simple can be good. Maybe all stories are really simple, and I just don’t see it.

So, kudos to you, J.J. Abrams. Now get back to work on the next Star Trek movie. I’ve got an itching to see some Spock ears…

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed your day. Original content will return tomorrow.

D.A. Bancroft





Annnd Stop

June 15, 2011

The “Make Me Laugh” Contest is now over. Finished. Klaar. Finis. τελικού. Ferdig. Terminado. 終了

(You will give a firm internet handshake to you if you can correctly guess all the languages I used right there.)

Thank you to anybody who participated. Thank you to everybody who even reads this message. Thank you for not going up in arms about me not posting for nearly a week.

After this point, I will go away to my research lab and begin processing who’s giggle-factor is bigger. That person will then be declared the winner. That person will then receive my congratulatory message and all will be right with the world. Except those dogs that howl in the middle of the night when I’m try to sleep…

Oh, and that one guy who honked his horn at me while I was driving like a normal and respectable human being. He’s not right in the world either.

Other than that, it will all be good.

And then I will start posting things on here, like a normal person.



The contest continues

June 15, 2011

So, I’ve been in hiding again. 

But that’s okay because I’m back again. No. It was not mutant corn husks this time. I’m just trying to become an adult and get a job.

You know how that goes, it’s kind of time consuming.

Anyway, my contest is still running.

If you have participated, then your odds of winning are extremely high. So far I’ve gotten as many spam comments as I have real comments. I even got a ‘denial of comment’ comment. So I guess that makes it two and a half. If I don’t get beat by the bots then I will consider this a victory.

If you have NOT participated, then get ready. Maybe you’re at work when you’re reading this. Take an early lunch (or just slack off like you usually do) and write a paragraph about something ridiculous. The goal of the contest is to make me laugh, and I’m sure your talented enough to make me of all people giggle. I even laugh when I stub my toe sometimes… You can be funnier than pain, can’t you?

Maybe you’re at home, and bored out of your mind. Since your so creative and you really feel those juices flowing, go ahead and drop me a few lines on my post with my contest. You can find that here. Trust me, the prizes are beyond your wildest dreams.

Hey, you don’t even need to accept the prize, just make me giggle.

So, 12 more hours until somebody becomes the victor. (Not the name “Victor”, but a champion of contest, victor.)

(Actually, I probably won’t declare a victor until that night).

Don’t worry though, the original content will come back online shortly. As a matter of fact, I’ve pretty much written my next post, but will wait until I claim a winner and then we will be firing on all cylinders again!

I shall rise again,


Really, I’m having a contest to see who can make me giggle.

You in?

Allow me to tempt you further.

The winner of the contest will receive this plethora of incredible and significant objects:

Best Prize Ever?

And there’s more. This is just the tip of the iceberg.

So allow me to explain myself and the rules for the contest. If you don’t want to read the explanation, and want to get right on to the rules for free stuff, then skip the next few paragraphs.

I’ve noticed a very strange theme through all of my stories (all 3 of them).  A lot of my characters seem to die. They usually die in some out of the ordinary manner or circumstance. I do this because I think it’s funny, but there is the chance that I could just be mentally disturbed…

Since death is considered by many people to be a very serious topic, let’s have some fun with it. All you have to do in this contest is tell me a funny story or situation where you are grieving the loss of something silly. You see, crying over your long lost granny is sad. But crying over your ice cube tray named Otis, that died in a tragic skiing accident, is funny. So let’s aim for funny here. Let’s try to make death a “not too serious” problem we can poke fun at.

In return I will give the winner a sympathy card and handwritten note expressing my condolences for your loss as well as the items listed in the picture above. Now here are the rules.

Rules for “In Sympathy” Contest

  1. To enter this contest you must post a comment on this particular post’s comment thread. Your comment must describe a very silly and made up event that would cause you to grieve for a loss of something. Your odds for winning go up if they are in a story form but they don’t have to be. Just be creative. (If you decide to post your story on your own blog, then provide a link to the blog in this comment thread).
  2. It must not be about anything real. It must be SILLY and MADE UP. Remember, we’re going for light hearted fun, not painful reality.
  3. I will pick the winner one week from today. That means you must have your comment posted by 12 p.m. (eastern time) on Wednesday, June 15th, 2011. I will inform the winner via email so I may obtain their mailing address.
  4. You will then win (in no particular order): A card and handwritten note of sympathy for your (very funny and made up) loss. A paper clip. A rubber band. An old guitar pick I don’t use anymore. And a marble of average size and of great importance. (More on the marble on a later date).
  5. No, I will not send you anything creepy or weird (other than the listed things above). No, you may not send me back anything creepy or weird. No, my hand is not included in the contest (even though it was in the photo).
  6. If the winner will not accept the prize, then it will be forwarded to the second place. If they refuse, then third place, etc. If nobody accepts the prize, then I will be happy to keep the marble for myself, and the rest will be destroyed.
  7. If you want to enter multiple times, (I’m not sure why you would), then feel free to do so. Just make sure each one is unique.
  8. Have fun.

Remember, the most creative/silly/made up event will win the contest. This means you can tell me a story or just describe something silly. Take your time with it. Treat it like a writing prompt if you wish. And try to make sure your story makes sense.